Things I Wish I’d Known in my Early 20s

Everything is new, confusing, and all of a sudden the stakes just got really high.

You know what I’m talking about. It’s the time before you know what interest rates really are, the late nights filled with food that’s barely food, the second puberty: I’m talking about the early 20s.

This article is my hug to the girl who was becoming a woman, and had to learn everything the hard way. I hope this gives you a cheat sheet to skip a few steps I had to take, and maybe changes a perspective or two.

Here’s everything I wish I’d known in my early 20s.

You’d be surprised how far a makeup remover wipe will go.
Make that $8.99 pack last longer. Soak the corner you didn’t use in water until you’ve used all four corners. Who said we have to be so wasteful and use the entire cloth once anyway?

Also, remove your makeup.
Yes, I’m serious. I don’t care how cute your blue liner is, remove it all before you go climb into that gorgeous bed. Your skin will thank you, and you’ll know you’re worth the extra effort.

Go to Aldi.
There will be a time for Whole Foods. It’s not when you’re in awe at the amount of your student loan. You’ll cut your grocery bill in half — promise.

Keep your car clean.
Stop driving a giant purse everywhere you go. It clutters your mind, and next to home, is the most important space to use every day. Keep it clean.

Everything you’ve learned about how to be successful in the world is about to turn on you.
Please the teacher. Sit still. The kids that raise their hands quietly and wait for everyone else to go, are the ones who get what they want.
These rules do not apply in the real world.
The rules were used to keep a school functioning — they’re for teachers to run classrooms.
But after that system, you’ll find that the student who wouldn’t stop talking to everyone in the class is the one that’s good at making job connections. The kid who challenged the teacher might be the one who isn’t afraid to assert themselves in the workforce, or even just at the DMV. Sitting back and being polite and letting everyone else go first will leave you wondering when your turn is.

No one will tell you it’s your turn.
You have to decide it’s your turn.

You have to completely let go of that formula in your head — the one where there was some overseer guiding you along the way and telling you when you were on the right track.
Now you have to know if you’re on the right track.

And by the way, for the first time in your life, you make the track.
Things aren’t linear anymore. No more school year, summer, repeat. You decide what the track is and where you want it to go.

It’s like going from TV episodes to movies.
Semester, break, semester, summer. You go from little chapters, to living a really long story. Be comfortable with that. Be happy when you make goals that can’t be achieved right away. It means they’re ones worth making.

Get off of social media and do things without posting about them.
Posting every moment makes our rich, beautiful, dimensional world so flat. Your life is so rich. Go live in it.

Have a reason for posting.
To lift up and encourage a friend, share something funny, promote something you believe in, or share a major life event you’re proud of with people you can’t catch up with — those are all good reasons.
And by the way, if there isn’t a reason, still take those pictures. Just keep them for you.

National park trips are a good trip idea.
It’s unbelievably cheap for an unbelievable experience. Split the gas. Go buy a year pass. Hike with friends.
It helps you see different parts of the country, get out in nature, and is a totally affordable way to travel at this age.
Bonus! — less distractions.
Since there’s no wifi to post, you’ll be fully present. And when you see something new you’ve never seen before (like a canyon! or a sequoia!) you will actually revert back to childlike wonder and playfulness, because that was the last time you saw something completely new in the world.

Read. Lots of books.
I have bad news: you have been taught to hate reading. Ever since 6th or 7th grade, who knows when it happens, there is a time where reading stops being taught as magical and beautiful and now is just useful.
It starts becoming your assignments. Something you do to study. Or to understand a car manual. Or to link to click for a news article that your relative posted that is really depressing.
So you have to discover this for yourself. Love reading. Find your genre — it might not be imaginary princesses slaying dragons. But then again, it might.

Cleanliness might actually be the closest thing we have to godliness. Wear it once. Wash it. (Unless we’re talking about jeans. Then, you just know.)

Some part of the day must belong to just you.
Incorporate something into your schedule that is just for you. Dance in the morning.

Find a reward that isn’t food.
Go for a walk, save up your favorite show to watch, or chat on the phone with a friend. There are so many ways to reward yourself for doing your adult life without always making food the prize.

Your body will crave whatever you keep feeding it.
Believe it or not, your body can crave healthy sandwiches and salads.
Find healthy food you enjoy, and eat it regularly. You’ll be surprised that your body craves it the same way you used to crave that chicken quesadilla with extra fiesta sauce on the side. (And the baja blast. At 2 a.m.)

Make a business card with no title. Carry it everywhere.
Just put your contact info. You’ll probably be wearing a lot of different hats in your younger 20s, so it makes no sense to have one title on there. But the card is worth it.
Have it and keep some in your wallet at all times. Sometimes you get opportunities you wouldn’t just because you come off as someone who values the person you’re talking to enough to share one, and because you show initiative in getting the cards made in the first place.

Your wardrobe should be all about mix and match.
You spend less money when your clothes are less specific. If you can only wear that shirt with that one pair of pants when your hair is styled just the right way, most of the time you are not getting your money’s worth. You will buy less and have more options if you buy versatile pieces when you can.

Workout. Seriously. WORKOUT.
Go do it. Now. Stop reading this and WORKOUT. You will get stronger, have more energy, get those endorphins, have better posture, sleep better, your aches will go away and I’m pretty sure your credit score goes up. Just WORKOUT. Even if that’s power-walk it out.

You might not always know your next step, and that’s okay.
Keep trying your ideas until something sticks. That’s how a lot of this is going to work in the beginning. Just keep going at it until something falls into place.

Keep your good friends close.
Follow through on phone calls. Be the friend that gets lunch with the person you keep saying you’ll do it with. Follow through. It will attract the best kind of people into your life.

Making a new friend as an adult is a lot like dating.
Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there and remember that you meet people like you when you are out doing things you love. You will meet the people you can Netflix binge-watch with when you are out in the real world. Get out there and meet them.

As much as you can, end every job on a good note.
Even if you couldn’t stand that boss. Even if the job made your feet hurt, and HR kept requiring weird trainings. Always try to leave jobs on a good note. You learned something from it and you never know where you might see those people again. (Even if not, just be decent to people, right?)

Find the people who have impacted you. And tell them thank you.
That teacher who told you exactly what you needed to hear.
That person in your family who has loved you and cheered you on.
A friend you used to know.
Find these people and find a way to tell them thank you. They need to know, and you’ll be surprised how much it means to you to say it.